Hugs, kisses, saying 'I love you', open exchange of gifts and PDA..... I used to always be surprised and ask myself, 'why are these expressions and trends new to us, particularly Indians/Asians; these concepts are making their in-roads into this part of the world just now while love is eternal and has been existing since time immemorial??'....'why have I never seen any of my elders or those from older generations openly admitting their love for their better-half?'..... But, they do love each other....
Got the answer today..... an expert from JNU subtly puts it this way....'The concept of personal love is considered European. It is always about impersonal love in the Eastern countries....here the love for parents, sisters, brothers and family are personal....the romantic love is impersonal'.....this sparked off my thinking further to elaborate that 'it is covert.......people shy away and try to show off their detachment to such romantic love to the world outside'.....
This is the way it is portrayed in the public, for the purpose of driving away the unnecessary attention. I completely fell for it.....
My doubts were real and do exist!! Such abstractions can also be explained.....
Thinking further, I had a contradictory explanation too. I feel there is more to the love among a couple in the Asian (Indian) context on the other side too, which is too much personal and is restricted to the closed chambers of the heart and space where only the two exist. The love is a complete circle with the nodes of loving, responding, questioning, arguing, teasing, shouting, fighting, thinking, brooding, reflecting, contemplating, taking time and re-loving. This roller-coaster of love is all about being themselves while being in a close-knit relationship too....... being the person they are without having to act sweet. This is possible only with an abandon and a grantedness that they are made (mad) for each other and their association is going to exist forever. It is without any fear about having to pay separation as the price for being oneself.
Such is the totally personal-impersonal and deep romantic love of the Asian Societies. So, a token followed by a check on the 'List of We Are In Love' seem vile and unnecessary!!
